Legend tells of a legendary gluten-free foodie whose cooking skills were the stuff of LEGEND. She traveled the lands in search of delicious food.
She liked to chew.
But she said nothing of it, because her mouth was often full of deliciousness
Then, she swallowed.
And then she spoke.
Enough talk, LET'S COOK!
Her cooking was so awesome, in fact, that those she served it to went mute from overexposure to pure AWESOMENESS!
She was awesome.
How could the people ever repay her?
No worries, my friends. There is no charge for awesomeness... or attractiveness.
It mattered not how many recipes she cooked, they were no match for her imagination.
Never before had a Primal Blueprint cook been so feared and so loved.
Even the most heroic heroes in all of Paleo-dom, The Furious 5 (Robb Wolf, Loren Cordain, Mark Sisson, Art De Vany, Kurt Harris-- who will probably be furious for being mentioned in a blog as goofy as this one), bowed to the great master.
But hanging out with them would have to wait, cuz when you're facing the 10,000,000 followers of conventional wisdom, there's only one thing that matters, and that's...
Hang on, my kid is calling me. Here, enjoy this completely unrelated clip until I can get back to you.
Okay... where were we? Oh, yeah, brace yourselves, Primal friends, I'm about to teach you KUNG FU!
The recipe below will revolutionize the Primal/Paleo culinary world. I have long tortured myself and agonized over it, because I felt like it was power in the wrong hands. Like Dr. Frankenstein unleashing his monster.
Most of all, I want to thank Shawn LoCascio for daring me to do this!
What you'll need:
4c tapioca flour
2c sweet potato flour(or 6c tapioca flour if you can't get sweet potato flour)
2 lbs butter (Oh, yeah, Paula Deen, I got your number!)
1 tsp salt
1T baking powder
some lemon juice
4 hours of your life that you'll never get back
In food processor, combine 1T lemon juice, 1 lb butter (broken into chunks prior to processing), a pinch of sea salt, 1c tapioca flour into a cream cheese consistency.
On a sheet of wax paper, turn the creamy paste into a 6" square. Lay another sheet on top and smooth out the square. Do not allow wrinkles to form in the paper.
When it's all squared and even, wrap and refrigerate. We will call this little friend "butter block".
In food processor, combine 2c sweet potato flour, and 2c tapioca flour with 1/4 lb butter (already chunked), 2t salt, and 1T baking powder into a coarse, crumbly mixture.
Turn out crumbs on to a counter top/working service that can retain a little chill, and is dusted with some tapioca flour (this is where the rest of your tapioca flour comes into play. Lots of dusting).
Form a small mound with crumbs, with a well in the center.
Starting with 1/4c, pour water into the well, and carefully pull some of the crumb in to begin forming a dough. Keep adding 1/4c water at a time until you've fully incorporated everything and have a dough ball. It will be a little tacky to the touch. Only add enough water as necessary. You don't want to end up with paper mache paste. That's why I encourage 1/4c at a time. Slow but steady...
It is very important to avoid kneading the dough as much as possible. Less handling = better end result.
When you have yourself a nice little dough ball, gently cut a 4 section cross partway through, like so. Wrap securely and refrigerate 15-20 mins.
After your dough has chilled, place it on a freshly dusted work space and gently unfold your 4 cuts, doubling the dough in size.
Carefully place your butter block (made earlier) into the center of the dough so that it forms a diamond.
Gingerly fold the corners of the dough over the butter block until it is fully concealed. (Ninja stealth mode!)
Dust the top of your doughy buttery block head with some tapioca flour and start to carefully roll into large rectangle, approximately 1/2" thick. Just keep dusting to prevent sticking and go slow and easy. It's a pretty temperamental critter, so just breathe and cater to it.
When you have a nice, neat rectangle, fold one side into the middle, then fold the other side over the top (like a pamphlet). Cover snugly and refrigerate 15-20 mins.
Remove your buttery dough pamphlet, dust with flour, and roll out into another rectangle, about 1/2" thick.
Fold yourself a new pamphlet. Cover snugly and refrigerate 15-20 mins. Repeat this 6 times. Make sure you are keeping track of which way you fold, because you need to turn it and fold it the opposite way on the next round. If your dough gets dried out, I suggest taking some of the remaining butter from the 2 lbs you set aside and melting it down. Brush it on just before you do a fold.
On the last fold, roll out to 3/4" thickness.
Congratulations, young one. You now know Kung Fu.
By the way, it would be wise, young grasshopper, to cut what you think you'll need from today's batch, and carefully freeze the rest. Layer with wax paper between sections, and seal in freezer bag.
You're probably gonna wanna do this with it:
WARNING FROM MASTER PJF: I am calling this Kung Fu because it is high carb and high fat (a lethal combination). Please bake responsibly! <3