Homemade Chipotle Mayo

I just want to say that I both love and loathe Red Robin.  I love it because I can get a lettuce wrapped 1,000 calorie cheese burger... and I loathe it because it's made me a chipotle mayo addict.  Heaven only knows what unnatural ingredients hide in that little cup of sunshine I slather on my monster burger!  I mean have you LOOKED at an ingredient list of a jar of mayo lately?
Soybean oil, "Natural Flavors", Calcium Disodium Edta... as if Soybean oil wasn't suspicious enough they add in the vague "Natural Flavors".  I mean WTH IS EVEN IN THAT?!
You know what?  F- YOU, MAYONNAISE!
I can do better.
And you can too, my friends!

What you'll need:

1 cup (16T) mild oil (avocado oil is very nice, but you have to watch it on olive oil.  It can get overwhelming fast.  Today we're using macadamia nut oil.  Cuz macadamias are the Mac Daddys of all that is good.  Read more here.)
1 egg
An acid souce (note:  NOT the fun kind.  We're talking about Apple Cider Vinegar, Lemon Juice, etc)
1 tsp yellow mustard
Chipotles in adobo sauce
A food processor

To food processor, place egg, mustard, and your acid.

Give it a whiz
Slowly, not more than 1/4c at a time, add your oil.  You need to drizzle it in and build it up.  This takes patience.  If you have a Ninja like me, it's wise to keep some paper towels on hand to rest the lid on in between drizzles.

When it looks like this, you're done.

If you're too big of a pansy, now would be a good time to place your mayo in another container in the fridge and call it a day.  However, if you're ready to leave Mamby Pamby Land, follow me!  To your newly minted mayo, add
2 chipotles and some adobo sauce. 

Now this is where it gets fun.  You can make it as hot or as mild as you'd like.  Personally, I'm a 4-6 chipotle girl.  In my opinion, 1 chipotle would make a decent FRY SAUCE (you big sissy!). Just keep adding chipotles one at a time with sauce and building it up, tasting each time.  Make it just slightly milder than you want, because you're going to toss it in the fridge and allow it to stew for a couple of hours (and, really, who likes room temperature mayo anyway?  Not me!)

Alternatively you can buy a habanero or ghost chili, but I think that would take all the fun of slowly building up your own custom flavor :P

Oh and one more thing! If you have high quality yogurt in the fridge (and, if you're like me, you DO!), skim some of the whey off the top (the clear, watery stuff) and add it to your mayo. Not only will it give you a little probiotic boost, but it will help your mayo keep longer too!

NUTRITIONAL INFORMATION (base only, serving size 1T):
131 cal, <1g carb, 15g fat, 1g protein, 5mg sodium

--A note to my fat phobic friends: I know that the fat & high cal look skeery, but TRUST ME on this. Homemade mayo is the way to go. It is WAY healthier and only takes 5 mins to make (I mean the low sodium alone should redeem it instantly). Honestly, I don't know why people waste $5 on a jar of mayo.